Sunday, 13 March 2011

Chirpy Chirpy Tweep Peeps

So my last blog was about why I like Twitter and why I joined it so I thought I would follow it up with the types of tweeps you can find on there. I'm not pigeon-holing people by doing this - to be honest most Tweeps will fit into a lot of the categories - I know I do! But these are just some general types I have come across on here.

The Slebo's (Celebrities)

The reason why most people join Twitter is to speak to their favourite celebrity. I think there would be very few people on twitter who don't follow at least one celebrity. I told you in my last blog that following celebrities is why I joined Twitter, and it became a game for me & my friends to try to get a Celeb to tweet us back or even follow us. And it is great when they do. When Davina responded to a tweet of mine it felt good - not that I went around telling people that Davina & I were very good friends in regular contact or anything. I'm not that sad!

The thing is Slebo's are not likely to respond to their tweets for the most part. I can understand why too. I only have 900 & odd followers & I get in put in #twitterjail at least 4 times a week, mainly for responding to people's @replies. Now imagine if someone like Stephen Fry tried to reply to everyone. He would always be in jail. Although it would be nice to get a reply it more than likely isn't going to happen. So those people who think that "Justine Beaver" - never speak the true name for just like Candyman if you mention him they will come (The Beliebers & Spammers) - will tweet you back and fall in love with you then you are wrong. I would just take the whole celeb thing as if you get a reply enjoy it, but don't expect to be drinking champagne at the next Brit Awards because of your online friendship with Kylie Minogue.

Saying that there are a fair few Slebo's that will reply to their followers. The likes of Dame @WinceyWillis1 is a perfect example of a good slebo to follow. She replies to her followers, is down to Earth and up for a laugh, and takes all th TV-AM & Treasure Hunt talk in her stride. Same with @JakeCanuso (Matteo from Bendidorm) and @DerrenLitten (Benidorm writer) - they like twitter and interact with their followers. Even some of the bigger twit celebs like @Schofe and @RealMattLucas - who have thousands of followers will go out of their way to respond to people and follow them.

That doesn't mean that you still don't want certain celebrities to follow. Personally I would probably jizz everywhere if @CaitlinMoran or @EmmaK67 followed me - because I like their sense of humour and think I could have a good laugh with them. If it ever happens keep an eye out for my When Harry Met Sally style tweet. The person who tweets back with "I'll have what he is having" gets extra bonus points.

The #FML Brigade

This is a harder category to write about because it will probably sound like I am slagging these people off but I am not really. In a way they entertain me. For those of you who don't know #fml means "Fuck My Life" - I assume it is for when something bad has happened to you but not catastrophic. There are people on Twitter though who use it for literally anything remotely shitty happening.

Typical tweets from a member of the #fml brigade will read "The hair dye hasn't worked #fml" or "I didn't have enough money to buy a Twix #fml" or "Mrs Doyle has got her tits out in Shameless again #fml" - it makes me laugh because how does any of that fuck someone's life? I suppose it is the new way of being a drama queen but what would I know. I'm not a member of the #fml brigade at all#fml!

Hornbags & Gladrags

A very big category on my timeline at least. I get followed by loads of flirty followers ranging from the "You are cute" peeps to the "How big is your cock" ones. To be honest this is one of my favourite groups of people - how good is it when someone starts flirting with you. I like the banter you get with these people and the laughs you can have by flirting back. All right sometimes people can get a bit full on with the flirting but for the most part it is harmless fun and I say long may it continue.

Banter Buddies

This is probably my favourite catergory and the main reason I return to twitter again & again. I love it when you build up a twiendship with someone to the point where you feel comfortable with having a bit of banter with them. When it becomes acceptable to accuse of follower of having a little cock, or ask them to get their tits out for the lads, or make jokes about their age then you know that you have got something good. I reckon about 10% of my followers come into this category. They are the ones that you miss if they aren't online while you are or who miss you if you are not there. All of you will have Banter Buddies on Twitter so make sure you keep them because it would be a lot more boring if they weren't around.

Silence is Golden?

If you are like me you will also have a lot of followers who follow you but don't really tweet with you. I have had a few like this who never tweet me but list me in their #ff - this is good in the fact that they obviously like you enough to keep following but bad in that they are too shy to talk. Sometimes though, like during the Numbers Game that happened a few months ago, you will get an unexpected tweet and think "who is this tweeting me" which is worse in many ways because how do you respond them.

My advice to the silent types is don't be afraid to tweet with people more if you like them.

Telly Hashtaggers

Another cateogory I come into and another thing that makes Twitter for me. I love it when a lot of tweeters are watching the same programme and take the piss out of. I am a renowned telly hashtagger and any reality style TV show is fair game for me. I only really started this during the last Big Brother but it is one of my favourite Twitter pastimes now. Some of the hashtags I see have me literally LOLing and even ROFLing and on one occassion I was very close to even PMSL. Some of the masters of this genre are @Lkue @Maxative @Elphabob @WillHoe and of course @Dazgale - I recommend following them even if its just for their hashtags!

Anyhoos this is a shorter blog than last time and not as good in my opinion, but I suppose it at least takes a light-hearted look at Twitter and it helped me pass an hour of my time so it achieved something.

I could do with a new topic for my next blog so if you have any suggestions feel free to let me know. I will try to make it funnier than this one too. Also if you want to write a guest blog then feel free to do so and I will post it on here.



  1. Not sure the comments thing works

  2. We love you for all the things you have just said. I feel a huge loss when you are not with us. So good to know you. You are outragious, caring, silly, and very smart. Being Winceybell with you is a great joy. XX

  3. Right I think I have fixed this now so anyone can comment and if you select Name/Url option you can comment as yourself!

    Thank you for your kind words Dame Wincey - the exact same could be said about you x

  4. Gaza you may well have inspired me to start a blog - though I do not promise to be as witty or exciting as yours but I do thank you for making twitter what it is for me - a place of witty escapism, sarcy banter and all round party of likeminded mad fools, often drunk on wine